Desk Chairs & Derrieres

It’s November and I haven’t written an office referral all year. Today I wrote 3. My students claimed I was just being “cranky.” Hmmm I don’t think that was it…

Block 1= Awesome

Block 2= Not Awesome

I took my class to the library to check out books. As I watched the class file out and walk the 100 feet to the classroom, I saw two boys pretending to kick a girl who was sitting on the floor by her locker. I pulled all three of them aside, and lectured them about “play fighting” while the rest of my class got seated and took out their books.

As I’m finishing up my lecture, I hear from inside the room: 

Student: No. Don’t do it. Calm down.

I turn and look into the room and see one of my smallest, yet most volatile, students holding an entire student desk (yes, the kind with the chair attached to it) above his head poised to throw it.

Needless to say, I lost it. There was lots of yelling involved about “butts in chairs” and… long story short- my students were afraid to breathe too loudly for the remainder of the period.

Block 3= Not awesome

Me: You need to take off that pacifier necklace. I told you yesterday that you were not allowed to wear it, and now I’m telling you again. I don’t want to see it around your neck, and I don’t want to see it in your mouth.

Boy Student: I don’t want to see it in your vag…

Me: That is completely inappropriate.

Boy Student: …with your Skittle colored pubes.

Later that same boy was in the library looking at a teen magazine with another boy and I overheard…

Boy Student: Yep. I’d bang her. And her. Not her, but I’d bang her.

As we were leaving through the double doors of the library, I noticed one of my pervy boys was hiding behind the door on the left behind a friend of his, who was waiting to come in.  Just as I passed the doors, I  lean my head around to tell him to get back into our line, and he pulls his friends pants down around his ankles. (I’m 98% sure his friend was a willing participant in the shenanigans due to the fact that as he reached to pull his pants back up, I noticed that his belt was undone, and his pants were un zipped.)


Block 4= Awesome.

I suppose the day could have been worse. My neighboring teacher found this gem waiting for her on her desk.


2 responses to “Desk Chairs & Derrieres

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